Be Pretty Not Petty: Why Do Women Compete With Each Other?

There have been a few times in my career where I've been rather disappointed with women in my workplace. No, I do not expect my female colleagues to go out their way or sing "Kumbaya" with me in the office. However, it bothers me when a woman could have been helpful to me and was not. When a woman has the opportunity to be a positive, influential figure and chooses not to be, or because of anxiety or fear tries to hurt me through gossip and propaganda, it really makes me wonder. 

Of course I'm very much aware, this is not a new thing plaguing society. Some women have always felt the need to compete or one-up each other for years. Coco Chanel and Elsa Schiaparelli, Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan, Lil Kim and Nikki Minaj, Miss Kitty and The Curvy Diva, just to name a few. But it's not just women, men are guilty of this type of behavior as well but surprisingly not as extreme. 

However, my dilemma is why do so many women tear each other down, rather than uplift them? What causes this competitive and aggressive nature? Is it deeply ingrained in our biology or is it a learned behavior? While we can accept that everyone's personality won't gel well and everyone won't always agree, we often share the common goal of being a boss. Nothing is wrong with a little competition to keep us motivated, minus the bashing and defamation of  characters. There are so many moving parts and sides to any story. However, I will say that it does more harm than good when we take part in meaningless cat fights or fail to support each other. 

Regardless of what it is that stirs your inner beast, at the end of the day we have choices. We can choose to take the selfish route and make it all about us and our accomplishments or we can choose to challenge ourselves to rise up, and set an example of what being a strong and supportive woman looks like. Be role models for our youth and encourage team work.  It's such a powerful thing when women support each other and join forces.